Deeply Awake — Another Change For The Better 11-14-13 By Kathy Vik
There’s a butt-ton of other stuff I could and, really, should be doing right now, just like a year ago, glued to my seat, far away and right up close, experiencing something extraordinary, and, after all is said and done, telling you about this is more important to me than clean laundry. I do look forward to going to the neighborhood laundromat today, though. I love the smell of laundry, and I love laundromats.
It started yesterday. The energy was intense, what I wrote was intense. Really happy intense, not dark, not at all. Just very sparkly, very focused, light but clear, I guess.
And then, after zoning out to Community Season 2, Disc 4 and playing a fetching game on the computer, I had one of those things, when I get all weird feeling, like I’m going to faint, and my heart slows down, and I did not want to pass out at the table, so I called it a night and crawled into bed.
I slept in blocks. Anymore, when in a period of expansion, I sleep for just a little bit, wake feeling completely rested, look at the clock and can’t believe so little time has elapsed.
That’s what happened last night. So I did what I always do, I go to the bathroom, get some water, and then return to bed for luscious other stuff. I know I’m going traveling, working, having fun, then. I get to go be active. And so, that happened until around 1, so two hours. And I woke up feeling extraordinary.
There’s that word again.
So, I was immediately aware, not like I usually am, not groggy or resentful for being awake (sort of a problem I once had…) no, this was different. Awake, aware, all aware. I saw myself cleaved.
I saw a big big part of me as diamond glittery, silver, and I was there, and I was surveying myself from there. I felt my life acutely, but none of it applied, none of it could be taken all that seriously. Odd. Not in a trivializing fashion, nor in a minimizing way, but as someone who is intimately aware of how the story is, in its totality.
It wasn’t a conscious decision, not the end product of some breathing meditation or mud bath or homeopathy, just waking up and knowing things I didn’t know before.
When I wrote in my journal, gosh darn it, it was frustrating, because everything I said sounded trite. Repetitions of stuff I keep repeating anyhow, but this time, I was inhabiting those sentiments, those understandings, somehow. The words were flimsy excuses for what I was trying to get across.
I’ll transcribe those notes for both of us now. I am very curious what I wrote. I will mention, the dictation was billowing at 1, and I really wanted to write, but I was tired and pretty disinterested, actually.
When I woke up again at 3, I was physically very fatigued. I did the physical stuff one must do to get comfortable, and then, I wished I had asked my body to make up for all the work I did, really get me rested, but I neglected to do that…
OK, here are the notes…
Split overnight. Woke up 3 times, 3 blocks. I saw my 3d life, all the stories, worries, I saw it like paper. Flimsy. Interesting, captivating but so flat. Then there was this other field, where I was, and I understood the 3d life is written by this biggerself. Embodying this larger mind. God. SO physical. I am CHANGED. I can’t fear my 3d life and I’m not worried anymore. This is not some kind of wordplay mind anesthesia. This is knowing that the setups and all are just that. Important but a by-product. But it’s not what I saw as much as how I STILL feel. Detached and delighted. Like my “life” is beautiful. I’m OK. This isn’t home, really, neither is India, South America. No. It’s someplace I visit but it’s not home. And yet I love it here, The Earth, I mean. I feel excited and as an equal when considering problems and questions and people I truly admire.”
Truth be told, all I want to do right now is go take a nap.
But the reason I interrupt that programming is because I have been able to sustain that feeling now, from since I woke up. When just coming to the last time, that sensation was a lot stringer. In the sort of woozy moments I had that last awakening, I ask for a key word, to make this key word be encoded with the whole thing, so that I can access it with just one word. Of course, this was a good idea, so it was done.
I can’t remember the word now.
So it will come back to me at the right time, but in the meantime, this feels good.
At the elevator, heading back to the apartment after dropping Sam off, I felt sort of like I was nicely vibrating. I thought, I wonder if this is how Lemurians felt. Is this old stuff?
I felt good, and I kept feeling/running this light, this sliver ghost behind me. And at the elevator, I invited the ghost, this bigger entity, to spin with me, from me, so that we could be together and not apart, and I felt the silver come through me, getting onto the elevator.
I closed my eyes on the way up, wondering if this is how it will be now, being able to do this with my eyes open. I know I have been doing that for a while, but not like this. Not like this.
I’m bound to settle down. Funny how tasks can be sort of soothing, doing repetitive, mindless tasks. They soother me, sometimes. Usually they anger me, that I have to do them at all. But if I can get into the right groove, doing stuff I don’t really like to do because it’s boring and repetitive and necessary, but now I am feeling gratitude for it. It is grounding, you know?
I wish I knew what other people’s experiences are. I’ve been more interested in channeled stuff lately… Meline LaFont’s one today just blew me away. It felt so good, so pure and true, for me. I was glad of it.
I am going to go and attend to my business now, but I wanted you to know what is happening. I like the feelings and thoughts I am having, and realizing more and more that there is something very special going on here, very auspicious indeed.
And that’s really all I have to say today. Thanks for tuning in, dear friend.