REPRINT: Deeply Awake ESSAY and CHANNEL “Worship”

First written and published on http://www.lightworkers.org, I have been receiving the urge to read this, and to republish, and so, I obey.

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DEEPLY AWAKE – “WORSHIP” ESSAY/CHANNEL 9-26-13 BY KATHY VIK
www.deeplyawake.tumblr.com

If I saw evidence, hard and fast, clear and true evidence, that you are divine, if I could see the patterning, appreciate the nuances, and see someone whole, and I fell on my knees and worshiped them, what would that be about?

What would possess me to think it appropriate to prostrate myself in front of another in deep adoration and honor? Could I express such a deep, lush palette of emotion without hooking into the desire to worship the person from which I saw the emanation?

I ask this because this came through this afternoon, upon arising from my night-shift-recovery-nap, I could feel it, see it, what it might be like to be approached by someone, them ablaze with divine love, recognizing in this work my love for God and for Self and for Them.

What might it be like to have someone approach you and just be convinced that you are holy?

Funny. I dwell in a land where everything is already holy. That’s my address anymore. I do not find it odd or ridiculous to see my fellow travelers as very effective creator gods, creating scenarios, realities, awarenesses from which they greet me, ask me the time, comment on the weather. It is old hat to recognize that everyone I meet, and I do mean everyone, regardless of social standing, life situation or appearance, everyone I meet is a master of synchronicity and love, but so few know it, so few know it.

And what would it be like if someone who is perhaps awakening enough to start feeling divinity in others, what if they decided it would be a real good idea to become my devotee, or anyone’s devotee, Aisha North, John Smallman, Pam Kribbe, Lee Carroll, Esther hicks, oh! there are so many who have been touched and who have then obeyed their instructions and conducted themselves in ways of integrity and love, to give a message to others.

What if that happened, someone saw something really big inside me?

And then, I guess I was honest with myself about a few things that I have been, perhaps, waiting to be honest about.

I thought about my path, my awakenings, my understandings, but more, how I lived these understandings. Of course, my heart went to my Teachers, those who came to me, taught and nurtured me, and then allowed me to walk my path, putting it all together, weaving it all into a cloth I can then wear as protection, as decoration, as symbol.

Would I be able to accept the adoration of another for work that I, to be frank, cannot comprehend came from my hands, my head and heart, at times? Could I accept this praise, without personalizing it?

I began to see, puttering around the house in my jammies, in a cloud of thought, that enjoying a great love for someone who, to you, embodies all that you have ever desired spiritually, this is not a bad thing, and actually, it is just another opportunity for self definition.

I’m skirting this issue and really not trying to. I am not being allowed access to its core. Let me quiet. I need to get this. It is big, important, and something that I feel needs to be shared. Allow me…..

It will be easier, for this next pat, if I assume the role of a heavy hitter. I like to imagine that it was Shiva talking to me this afternoon, and it is Shiva, and the rest of the masters, who want to help now. So imagine, please go with me there, to a place where it is you and your loved one, your sacred heart, you embodiment of love, your soul mate, in a way, your favorite master, who is hanging out with you, having a talk.

I think Shiva was telling me today, listen, kid, the love you feel toward me, the bliss that pulls you away from your mundane concerns and into the cosmic dance of ecstasy, the only reason, the one and only reason you feel this love toward me is that you embody this same love. I am a spark of recognition for you, a reminder.

He said, you could not feel this devotion and love if it were not already inside you. I remind you of all that you are, all that you are, all that you are. I am a symbol, but as such, oh! Inspire such ardor, such devotion, such love.

And I really never said that was necessary. None of us did. Most of us did out best to make sure you did not make this misinterpretation. Some of our words were not made clear, thought the ages.

Ours was a message of empowerment, of reminding you of what is there, within you, intact and pure, and this pure light of God which is shining from your pores, this is the same godliness we have come to take as our lover, our counselor and our destiny.

And it is just from what energetic perch you wish to view us, we anomalies, we messengers, that determines your experience with the divine.

To see us as anything but cosmic brothers and sisters who walk with you, helping you, congratulating and rooting for you, to think we are anything but this, it is not entirely optimal.

We are mirrors for your divinity, and as such, we had every need to conduct ourselves accordingly. It did not matter that we were alone in a cave, or jail cell, or mountain top. Even all alone physically, we act in ways which have integrity, we are in alignment with Source, and so we are aware of the need to conduct all of our moments as highly tuned and trained consciousness.

It was not, primarily, about audiences or onlookers or devotees. First and foremost, it was always, how much can we embody? How can we conduct this moment, this Now moment, in the highest expression of the Benevolent All? This is the task. This is the moment. The now moment, a string of them which is eternal, influential, certainly, and pure, running right through the history of consciousness.

Of course, it mattered how we conducted our affairs among men, but often our affairs were misconstrued, misinterpreted, and this is what we wish to discuss.

You will come to see that another’s devotion is their expression of their understanding. It is beautiful, but it is coming to an end, and we wish to tell you about it.

The reason, dear one, that you could never see this work of yours find traction, it has so much to do with this concept, it deserves your attention.

You had to write this under the covers, so to speak, without interference, and certainly without praise.

Praise, dear one, would have been the exact opposite of what was necessary. You had to come to find worth in this work on your own. It is your expression of your devotion to Creator. It needed no hands upon it, molding it, guiding it. We guided it, you guided it, it was personal, it was to be done quietly.

And now, if someone comes to you and tells you that they see within you the light that is behind our eyes, what can you say now, dear one, except, sure, that makes sense, thanks, and off you would go, in your blue jeans, off to a movie with your son, off to the mountains for a picnic, off to work.

Each of you know that your work, your life, your creation, it is absolutely and utterly divine. Each of you Solar Angels, our representatives from the great Central Sun, do you not feel it now, we are ever connected, and the overlays covering this truth from you have been stripped bare.

An obsession comes from seeing the divine in another and not being able to know that this love you feel for the other, it is only because there is an equal reserve of the same stuff within you, that you can vibrate with it at all, that you can recognize it.

That which is divine, complete and realized within you is what recognizes and loves that which is divine, complete and realized in another. The degree to which this love is imbued with desperation, with a sense of despair or melancholy or homesickness, this is the degree to which you have incorporated the truth that you are simply recognizing our essence within your own structure, can you see this? One’s inability or unwillingness to accept their own divinity, their own integrity, this is the engine of worship, obsession.

Rather than simply owning that which you see within the masters as a reflection of your own wholeness, most feel only the spark of recognition of home, and this leads them to great happiness, great fulfillment, and there is no shame in this, this is a good movement forward, but the clinging, worshipful stance many take in their lives is but a sign that they have mastery yet to attain.

Many of you find it impossible to couple in this energy, for the requirement is there, in the social contract, to use this as the template for love relationships.

The Other is seen as The All, an embodiment of love, someone who can help the devotee to feel whole, to feel recognition and acceptance from that which is loved and honored.

It is the desperation which lurks that we are addressing today.

The arms outstretched, the constant craving to be with The Other, whether it is a human being you are in love with or a master, this is the heart of it for today.

This hunger, which has humanity leaning with outstretched arms toward that which appears unified, without judgment and all loving, this is the point. If it is done in a church or in a bedroom, is there really that much of a difference? It is the same love, we tell you, just different targets.

But all of it points to the need to bring it on home, bring it within, personalize and own and claim it as yours.

Without master. Without guru. Without mate.

Can you do this?

There are social taboos around this, and so we honor your bravery.

When people come to you, feeling you hold answers they themselves cannot access, because your paths have been hard and your ways solitary, some of you will be more than surprised at the devotion you yourselves might start stirring up, we tell you.

If that comes to pass, how will you handle it?

You will, of course, our brothers and sisters, have this full knowledge. You will conduct yourselves holding within you the truth, that yes, you are divine, yes you are holy, yes you are shaman, priest, nun, master. Through your arduous climb, you have come to see that this is so, and that this is the truth for each.

Because you can see your beloved in the eyes of all you meet now, love will come. Because you have settled into your own truth, wisdom is your companion. Because you have chosen to define yourselves in terms other than strictly human, and because that definition is now no longer a preference but an imperative, you can see, can you not, that the love another holds for you is right and true and good, but is entirely impersonal. It is the onlooker gazing into a mirror and loving the reflection, and being unable to understand that it is their own face there are looking at instead of yours.

We ask you formulate a word which more fully encompasses the love you feel for us, and we for you. We are not truly masters, we are brothers and sisters. We are not christs, we are family. We are not saviors, we are counselors.

We are your equals, and this is the way of it. We are your equals, you are equal to us. Do not encourage followers. Do not encourage devotees. You are human beings, as were we. We do not encourage you persist with the old energy, the misinterpretations which have led to this age.

You will come to sense great completion, great wholeness of countenance, and with it, great relief and homecoming for your personality portion, for the self who guided you to these shores.

You will come to see that another’s recognition of your divinity is a cause for celebration, for mutual homecoming. You will be able to accept this assessment, and you will be able to say, “Oh, of course I am an emanation of divinity. Of course I am. And you could not see it if you did not also have this divinity within you.” You will accept the gifts so graciously and nervously given, with great humility and thanksgiving and heartfelt appreciation. And you will leave the conversation uplifting the one who has uplifted you. For you see that no one can love you in this way without having been set aflame by their own holy core.

We leave you with a reminder. It is a good practice to come with us into bliss, and to merge into The All with us, holding our hand. It is wonderful for you to allow yourselves to be transported in bliss to the godhead, and we are so in love with you, we wish to dance with you to this place, celebrating and honoring the ones who now know the way!

We know of your overwhelming love for us. And we only wish to remind you that this love is from YOU, of YOU, for YOU, as much as it is for your idea of us.

Let us walk with you, counseling and laughing with and planning with you. Let us walk with you, dance with you, and let us help you be transported to ecstasy, just as often as you see fit. But please never assume that this love is anything but your ecstatic reunion with yourselves.

That was the end of the transmission.

I had to go and collect my son from school, and it is not my way to quit an essay half way through, but here I am, to finish this up.

This is a weird departure, but one I have done twice before, just putting along, trying to put things together, and then, while in the act of writing, I quiet, still, and let another speak. It’s what the best of the writing is, really, just channeling, all of it, just channeling.

What dawned on me as I was walking to the car is that this love I feel for God, it is expanding, and it is really very alive, anymore. I love my Baba Ganesh, I love all the icons, the masters, the deities, but I see them has friends, road maps and hopeful insertions of truth into a matrix that had been overdue for sparkly love.

One of my first teachers, way back, he used to tell me, it was one of his foundations, that for all the sparkly work, for all the internal work which we feel called to do, as if it is our first and most pressing priority, for all of it, we really are just as plain as mashed potatoes. Many of us are nothing much to look at. We may have humble jobs. We may have personality foibles and may have engaged in immense hobbling of our power, but, when all is said and done, all we are is plain as mashed potatoes.

And I like that. I love it, really.

So, I leave you to ponder it out. Was I just using a technique of fiction, “imagining” myself speaking to a force I have come to recognize as family, or was I allowing the family to speak through me? Who knows, who cares, was what was said beautiful, uplifting, does it feel true, right, pure?

Heck, I don’t know, because I have not read what I wrote, and have no memory of the details. I am always just as surprised as you, the first read through. I’m always a little shocked at what comes out.

But I trust that my fingertips can not be used for harm, this mind is devoted to looking up, anymore, and there is no desire in me to lie, to obfuscate, to cover that which has always been hidden.

Who knows?

But, what I am left with is this almost-understood thing from when I was waking up. This understanding that if someone feels the need to worship, this is nothing but a beautiful gift form someone who has not yet fully embodied their own divinity, someone who can feel gongs go off around us, someone who recognizes themselves in our faces.

I could not have done this work with adoration, fame, and the money part, that is a different issue entirely. Those money issues are coming up, they are on their way to completion.

For now, I feel good for knowing that there is nothing here within me to worship and everything to celebrate. Nothing here to devote oneself to. Nothing here requiring anyone abandon their awarenesses or their truth. Just a humble nurse from Colorado, jotting down stray thoughts onto her crappy netbook, in between events which, as are their wont, keep occurring.

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